Review - Argylle
Directed by: Matthew Vaughn
Written by: Jason Fuchs
Starring: Bryce Dallas Howard, Sam Rockwell, Henry Cavill
Running Time: 139 minutes
Rating: 1/5
No matter what you may think of his decorated filmography - whether they’re flops, they’re over-the-top or they’re delightfully absurd; Matthew Vaughn sure has no shortage of style and flair with a gonzo appetite for crowd-pleasing cinematic entertainment. From his electric debut with Layer Cake to the fantastical adventure of Stardust, franchise blockbusters with X-Men: First Class and the bloody-brilliant chaos of Kick-Ass & The Kingsman series; Matthew Vaughn has solidified himself as a filmmaker for the celebratory masses. He’s the person you go to for a cinematic eye for the slow-motion set-piece, for a sly, profane humor and a knack for blissfully captivating world-building.
Which makes it all the more shameful to report that his latest feature, Argylle; an ensemble rag-tag globe-trotting espionage comedic adventure is, unfortunately, a wooden, lifeless imitation of what a great Matthew Vaughn film could and should be. At the core of Argylle, the film feels like a clumsy mish-mash of ideas, tones and/or set-pieces that are just thrown into a over-long, excruciatingly wrought 139 minutes of a studio banking on a franchise pilot. Even if the film feels uneven, lazy and a bit of a slog - it certainly still feels like a Vaughn film, though, unfortunate in its excruciating execution and half-realized opportunities. Elly Conway, a novelist famous for penning the hit spy series “Argylle,” is caught in a whirlwind of mistaken identity, high-stakes espionage and conspiracy that begins to mirror the adventures of her very own Agent Argylle character. Elly’s world is shattered as she is challenged by both existential and personal identity crises both thrust deep into a dark conspiracy in her past.
The narrative is as meta as you can expect; layers upon layers of world-building with characters weaving in and out of reality. The film weaves the present reality of Elly and Agent Argylle simultaneously as her own experiences begin to merge and meld into that of her stories. As creatively interesting that sounds on paper, it is disappointing to note that the film’s own narrative feels telegraphed exceptionally from its beginning. It doesn’t help if the film’s marketing pushed repeatedly the revelation of the twist - the real identity of agent Argylle. As much as the film takes its inspiration from Mission: Impossible and the constant threats of double-crosses and allegiance shifts; the film’s so-called complexity is disappointingly naive, boring and a little bit annoying. The dialogue in this film is exceptionally expository: a character sits in front of another and drops the biggest twist of the film, only for it to come off almost begrudgingly one-note and even too casual. An almost yawn and you’ll miss it moment.
Argylle is definitely built for an ensemble cast - and for what it’s worth, the silliness of the fictional Argylle sequences are bearable and tongue-in-cheek in its parody of the spy genre. Henry Cavill and John Cena eat up every moment they have on screen; they chew up every absurd punch-line and eye-rolling over-the-top CGI-infested stunt set piece. On the other hand, Bryce Dallas Howard and Sam Rockwell dominate the film’s screen time and sadly, their scenes feel boring, dry and almost routine in their performances. It’s surprising, especially with Vaughn behind the camera, to pull at such creative threads just for a film to feel lifeless, dull and ultimately, very boring.
Maybe it’s a disservice to the film itself to compare back to the previous works of Vaughn; who has cleverly mastered the tonal shifts in Kingsman and even Kick-Ass from dark, moody and ultra-violent to hilarious, laugh-out-loud and even full of heart. It does feel like Vaughn hasn’t forgotten his stylistic mastery; he trades the blood and guts of Kick-Ass to magical flourishes of rainbow coloured gas, slow-motion knife battles across a slick of crude oil and a Beatles needle-drop that is both excruciating and surprising. Somewhere in the midst of whatever disaster Argylle turned out to be, the film carried the barebones of ideas that could have been something special. Too bad.
Argylle is a muted version of what Vaughn has been capable of, unfortunately resulting in a film that is lacklustre, disappointing and unflinchingly dull. With a runtime marathoning close to two hours and thirty minutes, Argylle’s glacial pace is a cumbersome trek for a payoff that feels unearned and unrealized. A trick of the trades; the film’s marketing is built on the crux of it’s ensemble cast, a wacky, goofy semi-serious spy thriller across the world - but also the revelation of the film’s primary twist - the truth of agent Argylle.
By the time the film ends, it won’t matter who Agent Argylle is. By the time you reach your car, you’ll no longer care.
